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The English Language Was Carefully, Carefully Cobbled Together By Three Blind Dudes And A German Dictionary.*
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I've been listening to Penn Jillette's Every Day Is an Atheist Holiday!, and I think I've found my soulmate.
Practically the first thing he talks about is how the lyrics to Shaft drive him crazy and here's why. The tune is great, and up until the very end they lyrics are perfect in their simplicity. But then we get to this: He's a complicated man/But no one understands him but his woman/(John Shaft).
The first problem is that first But. It makes no sense. Saying he's a complicated man but no-one understands him but his woman makes it sound like as a complicated man, everyone should understand him, which is not what being complicated means. It would make morse sense to say and no-one understands him but his woman. He's complicated; only his woman understands him. But Jillette's stand is that there's no need for anything there. Just, He's a complicated man/No one understands him but his woman would be fine, it scans.
That's aggravating enough, but the there's the (John Shaft). Following directly after But no one understands him but his woman, it sounds like his woman's name is John Shaft, which—well, maybe it is. He's a complicated man, he could have a woman named John. (By this time, I'm giggling uncontrollably.) But that's kind of unclear, maybe it should be Mrs. Shaft.
All of this is really funny, but the reason he's my soulmate is the Jackson 5's I'll Be There, a song I really like but which has a line that drives me nuts. It comes late in the song and it goes If you should ever find someone new/I know he better be good to you/'Cause if he doesn't/I'll be there (I'll be there).
The problem is the verb doesn't. It should be isn't, because it goes with he better be good to you, the verb is be. Does doesn't enter into it. What he's saying is "if he doesn't be good to you," when what he should be saying is, "if he isn't good to you."
Penn Jillett is clearly a grammar nerd and would understand this. I find this very comforting.
He also understands something I've been saying for years: how it is possible to lie and tell the truth at the same time, or how it is possible to say something that isn't true that is not a lie.
This is important. Lying requires intent.
If I tell you something I believe to be true, but which, in fact, is not, I am not lying; I'm just wrong. If I tell you something that I believe to be untrue—even if it really is true—I'm lying (at least in my heart).
*Dave Kellett
-:- -:- -:- -:-
I've been listening to Penn Jillette's Every Day Is an Atheist Holiday!, and I think I've found my soulmate.
Practically the first thing he talks about is how the lyrics to Shaft drive him crazy and here's why. The tune is great, and up until the very end they lyrics are perfect in their simplicity. But then we get to this: He's a complicated man/But no one understands him but his woman/(John Shaft).
The first problem is that first But. It makes no sense. Saying he's a complicated man but no-one understands him but his woman makes it sound like as a complicated man, everyone should understand him, which is not what being complicated means. It would make morse sense to say and no-one understands him but his woman. He's complicated; only his woman understands him. But Jillette's stand is that there's no need for anything there. Just, He's a complicated man/No one understands him but his woman would be fine, it scans.
That's aggravating enough, but the there's the (John Shaft). Following directly after But no one understands him but his woman, it sounds like his woman's name is John Shaft, which—well, maybe it is. He's a complicated man, he could have a woman named John. (By this time, I'm giggling uncontrollably.) But that's kind of unclear, maybe it should be Mrs. Shaft.
All of this is really funny, but the reason he's my soulmate is the Jackson 5's I'll Be There, a song I really like but which has a line that drives me nuts. It comes late in the song and it goes If you should ever find someone new/I know he better be good to you/'Cause if he doesn't/I'll be there (I'll be there).
The problem is the verb doesn't. It should be isn't, because it goes with he better be good to you, the verb is be. Does doesn't enter into it. What he's saying is "if he doesn't be good to you," when what he should be saying is, "if he isn't good to you."
Penn Jillett is clearly a grammar nerd and would understand this. I find this very comforting.
He also understands something I've been saying for years: how it is possible to lie and tell the truth at the same time, or how it is possible to say something that isn't true that is not a lie.
This is important. Lying requires intent.
If I tell you something I believe to be true, but which, in fact, is not, I am not lying; I'm just wrong. If I tell you something that I believe to be untrue—even if it really is true—I'm lying (at least in my heart).
*Dave Kellett